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How's My Driving?

Do you have any feedback or critique on how I play Mack? Please share your thoughts, questions and concerns here. ANON: ON SCREENING: ON IP-LOGGING: OFF If you are new to writing critiques and don't know where to start, feel free to check out my Critique Etiquette Post. If you would prefer to crit me in a more private manner, send a PM!

application for alteredstates

Character Information Character Name: Mackenzie "Mack" Jolene Stuart Canon: OC Canon Point: Time from their canon in which character is taken. If there's additional information/events/CR from a previous game, please include a brief description after the canon point they were originally taken from. Character Journal: theconsequences Appearance: About 5'3'', Mack isn't particularly imposing physically, but she does her best to make up for it in image and attitude. When she is at work, she adheres to the diner uniform; but only so much as is actually required of her. In her off-time, she usually dresses in sloppy, torn jeans and dark tank tops, and when she's out partying, prefers to sport tight pants and form fitting, short dresses. Her hair is naturally blonde, dyed two-toned with different shades of pink depending on her mood (and if she's gotten around to reapplying the dye recently.). Mack also loves cheap, showy costume jewelry and is rarely seen without a number of silver rings, bracelets and earrings. Mack! Another picture. Her icons. Age: 20 History: Mack was born and raised in the small town of Truth or Consequences, New Mexico. Her mom, Peggy, had her when she was only 17, and Mack grew up never knowing her biological father. Peggy always claimed to not "remember" who he was, but Mack long ago accepted the fact that her father was a dead-beat who probably skipped town once he found out Peggy was pregnant and never looked back. When she wasn't drinking or hanging out with the "boyfriend of the month," as Mack dubbed them, Peggy worked multiple jobs to keep the small family afloat. Eventually Peggy was able to afford a run-down double-wide trailer that Mack has called home most of her life. Although Peggy was arguably negligent, she cares deeply for her daughter and they have a relatively good, if somewhat rocky, relationship. Peggy was never much of a mother to Mack, always fulfilling more of a friend role, and Mack grew up wild with little guidance. However, in elementary school, Mackenzie befriended the pretty and popular Isobel Martinez. Izzy was the polar opposite of the spunky blonde - affluent, ditzy, and the daughter of the mayor, she wasn't particularly the most obvious candidate for a best friend. But Izzy and Mack hit it off, and have been nearly inseparable ever since. Since Mack's mother wasn't very present, Mack often found herself at Izzy's house. She was enchanted by the comparative opulence that surrounded her friend, but also the stable and unbroken family Izzy lived in. Mack took to calling Izzy's grandmother her abuela, and in kindergarten, made a Valentine for Izzy's older brother, Javier. That small gesture ignited a life-long crush on the older boy that Mack still harbors even as an adult. While Izzy's passion was dancing, Mack never particularly developed any ambitions of her own. She preferred the party scene, spending most of her nights forgoing her homework and drinking and dancing with her friends. However, as a young child, Mack did harbor an interest in music and after inheriting a beat up guitar, Mack taught herself to play. Mack and Izzy went as far to start a two-woman band in the fifth grade - Izzy singing and Mack on the guitar - although their organized musical pursuits did not last long. Mack continued to practice, however, but now she will only play it for Izzy, and the girls still talk about reviving their band. While Izzy insists Mack is a musical prodigy, Mack honestly believes her friend is only being nice. However, Izzy and Mack still enjoyed evenings out at the Karaoke bar, where they could pretend to be superstars. The outings often included Javier, which encouraged Mack to attend them even more. Due to Mack's unambitious personality, she also didn't particularly apply herself in school; although extremely intelligent, she didn't put forth the effort and managed to coast through with barely passing grades. Once they graduated, Izzy moved to Albuquerque to attend college, while Mack stayed behind and got a job at one of the local White Coyote Cafe. Mack continued her partying lifestyle, especially even more so since her only stable family was mostly absent. Mack concentrated on living day to day and enjoying herself, having no plans for the future. She continued to live with Peggy in the trailer, and when she wasn't at work, she blew her money at parties, clubs in Las Cruces and on booze and cigarettes. She often brought home guys, but rarely had "boyfriends" and when she did, the relationships usually lasted no longer than a couple weeks. When she was 19, Mack ran away to Las Cruces for two months with a guy named Gabriel, who she had ever intent of marrying. Unfortunately, Gabe ended up in a lot of legal trouble and their differences caused a rift, resulting in Mack returning back to T or C, moving back with in her mom and begging for her job back at the Cafe. Mack was already wary and jaded about successful relationships and long term plans, and her failed relationship with Gabe only made her harder towards such things. Not long after Mack returned, Izzy blew out her knee in an accident and ended up leaving her dance program to return to T or C. Once she settled back in, she got a job at the White Coyote Cafe with Mack and they have been working there ever since. Izzy convinced Mack that they should save up their money and move to Albuquerque to restart their band, and Mack willingly plays into Izzy's dreams and ambitions, although she personally does not feel hopeful that she will ever experience any kind of success. For the most part, she has resigned herself to living a life identical to her mother's, trapped in Truth or Consequences forever. Personality: Mack is a little contradictory, a reflection of her stunted maturity due to the lack of guidance in her life. While she can be a kind young woman, Mack has a tough streak that keeps the people around her on their toes. She tends to be extremely reactionary, impulsive, and wears her heart on her sleeve, and it's rather easy to know what kind of mood she is in. And usually, that mood is somewhat annoyed. Izzy is the ditzy, fun loving of the two; Mack tends to be more pessimistic and sarcastic, preferring to prepare herself for the worst in any situation. Mack says exactly what her on her mind, and is often tactless in her observations. Mack also does not particularly care for any kind of authority, and has little to no respect for anyone in her life that is an authority figure. This is likely tied to her relationship with her mother; since Peggy always treated Mack as more of a friend than a daughter, Mack did not really grow up with any respect for her, nor did Peggy try to enforce she develop any. There is only one exception to this; Izzy's Abuela, who was the first person to really put her foot down with Mack. As the matriarch of the Martinez family, Mack couldn't help but respect Abuela's position of authority, and even often went to Abuela for guidance and support. That said, Mack is incredibly loyal to the people she cares about and will fight for them, usually physically. Her trademark attack is the stomach punch, which she has used on multiple sleezy guys in her time. She will freely fight anyone who upsets or becomes a threat to Izzy, and making her best friend cry is a quick way to wind up on Mack's hate list. Even if she tends to be a little prickly and obnoxious, Mack knows she owes a lot to Izzy and her family, and she will not let anyone mess with them if she can help it. Izzy has been Mack's best friend since kindergarten, and if anything, they are closer to sisters than best friends. While Mack would be the first to say Izzy is annoying, a prude and a giant ditz, the truth is, she is the most stable thing in Mack's life. Izzy managed to keep Mack out of serious trouble through middle school and high school, and it wasn't until Izzy went off to college that Mack found herself getting more out of control. For as hard and dismissive as Mack can be on her good-natured friend, Izzy keeps her grounded and is one of the few people in her life, besides Abuela, who forces Mack to keep in mind the consequences of her actions. Although Mack would never admit it, it's something that she is extremely thankful for. Relationship wise, Mack has really only ever fallen for one person in her life; she is nuts about Javier, Izzy's brother, and has been since she met him as a child. That said, her attachment to him doesn't stop her from dating; and unlike Izzy, Mack isn't particularly religious and has no qualms about casual sex. While she does form strong bonds with people, she has yet to form a romantic attachment that goes beyond casual dating except in the case of Gabe, and Mack was very disappointed over how he let her down. Due in part to her lacking in self-worth and refusing to form long term romantic bonds due to inevitable disappointment, Mack often moves through boyfriends at the same rate as her mother. Even though her mother's inability to maintain a stable relationship has always deeply bothered Mack, she recognizes it as both their lots in life to never have someone who will unconditionally and loyally love them, and Mack has resigned her romantic pursuits to fleeting moments of happiness and fulfillment rather than look for anything long term. In a lot of ways, Mack is still incredibly immature. She is very lazy and has little ambition, besides her love of guitar. However, Mack has no faith in herself as an artist and refuses to play for anyone but Izzy, so she doesn't actually believe she is that talented. Mostly, she sees her mother and the failures and disappointments Peggy has experienced in her life, and Mack is determined to keep the bar of her own life low enough so that she can never be disappointed by her own failures. Izzy is the only once who is close enough to her to encourage her to try harder, and it took a lot of convincing for Mack to finally agree to setting a goal to move to Albuquerque and pursue their music career together once they had the money. The only reason Mack really agreed, however, is because she secretly believes it is an impossible dream to achieve and she won't have to ever follow through. While Mack is often straight-forward with her feelings, another mark of her immaturity is the fact that she constantly feels she needs to put on a show by acting like a bad ass. In actuality, she can be extremely sensitive, and suffers from low self-esteem that she will never admit to. She loves music, but only claims to enjoy more trendy club bands and would never publicly own her undying love for artists like Taylor Swift. Admitting something like that makes her feel weak, and there isn't anyone besides Izzy's immediate family that knows that Mack can be extremely more sensitive than she ever lets on. Mack, while good-natured and sometimes sweet, has a calloused streak that developed due to her somewhat wild and mostly unobserved upbringing. She is extremely pessimistic about the future and because of that, she doesn't often allow herself to think too far ahead; instead, she concentrates on the fun and enjoyment of the present. Fortunately, her best friend is mostly the polar opposite of her, and having Izzy in her life is helping to give Mack a more balanced perspective. Powers/Special Abilities: She is very gifted at guitar and doesn't realize it. Otherwise, she's totally normal. River Power: Shapeshifting. Large form is a coyote and small form is a roadrunner. In her roadrunner form, the tuft of feathers on her head seem to have a pink tint to them. Reason for Character Choice: I haven't played an OC in a number of years and I never have in journal RP, although I have always liked the idea and thought about doing it. Holly was telling me about how she used to play Izzy in a forum RP a while back, and that she had really enjoyed the character and was considering rebooting her to app to Altered States. I not only liked the idea of an OC, but one that was from a normal, every day world and who did not have a particularly special background to get launched into alternate New York. So Holly and I began to toss around ideas of a character I could develop that would play into her already existing universe for Isobel, and Mackenzie was born. Additional Information: Holly will be apping Izzy, so they are technically canonmates. Since Mack is a new character, a lot of her development into a complex and 3-dimentional character will come from her play and relationships within Altered States. Writing Samples First-Person Transmission Sample: A Dear Mun post. Third-Person Log Sample: Voice test/log.